What they don't teach you in Spanish class

Ingrid was locking up Luz y Vida while I sat on the stoop waiting for her.  "Annie, the alarm won't set" she called out.  I wasn't worried, it had happened before, usually shutting the door again took care of it. But no, we both tried, multiple times, and we couldn't activate the alarm.  

I called the customer service number and was told to make sure all the motion sensors on the third floor were working.  Check.  Back to the phone.  "Push the following buttons on the alarm panel".  I couldn't quite reach from the phone, so I told Ingrid what to push.  All was going well until I leaned over to see which lights were lit up on the panel, and disconnected the phone from the wall.  

The other phone in the kitchen started ringing, the technician calling me back.  I ran over to answer and proceeded to shout commands to Ingrid. "Push asterisks twice.  Ok, now the pound sign"  Nothing seemed to be working.  "Maybe you're entering your activation code wrong." the tech suggested.  I've only been entering the same code at least 5 times a week since February first.  "It's not wrong" I told him.  "Ok, then press and hold P" he responded.  The alarm went off.  Loud.  "All right, now put in the activation code" he told me.  "Ingrid!  The activation code!" I shouted.  The alarm kept going off.  "See, you are using the wrong code" he sounded smug.  Becka peeked around the door.  "what did you say?  Ingrid couldn't hear you over the alarm".  A blessed silence descended again.  "It was right." I told him (see, I told you, I thought).  

Finally, he realized the reason he wasn't getting any results to the tests he'd run was that the landline we were using was the same line tests should be run through.  He got my cell number, and I could stand right in front of the panel.  Push these buttons.  Check.  Run up to the 3rd floor and look at the sensors again.  Check. Push some more buttons.  Check.  All right, 3rd floor is deactivated, the rest of the alarms should be working, we'll send out someone to see what the problem is tomorrow.  Name please?  I sighed.  I already knew what was going to happen. I spelled my last name.  Slowly.  Then I spelled it again.  Yes, it has a k in it.  Yes, s then l.  S, yes.  S, like sun.  Yes, two e's in a row.  (I think to myself, Yes, I am a foreigner.  That is why you have no idea what to do with my name.  I KNOW it's not normal, but please, work with me on this one.  Just write the letters as I tell you.  I do know how to spell my last name.   Why have I not married a Colombian and changed my last name already?  It would save me a lot of trouble. . .)  My last name finally confirmed, I walked towards the door to lock it and close it behind me.  One second too late.  The alarm began to sound.  It took me too long confirming my name on the phone and the alarm was already active when I walked past it.  

I sighed, unlocked the door, walked back inside, dialed the number again.  With barely disguised impatience, the technician said, "I told you if the alarm "dispare" again, you could just ignore it, it would go off by itself."  Wearily, I realize that the word disparar, that I'm familiar with meaning to shoot a gun, means to go off, in this context.  Oh yes, he had mentioned that.  I overlooked it.  Oh well.  We walked through the code process again, at which point I somehow managed to unplug the phone from the wall again.  He, fortunately, called my cell.  I finally set the alarm, walked out of the building and locked the door and both gates behind us.

Forty five minutes later, problem solved.