still

My mind and heart have been swirling with questions and emotions lately. I want answers. I want a plan. I want a vision for the future. I want joy, and adventure, and anticipation.

So, I've cried, I've pleaded, I've talked to God. And over and over, He keeps telling me to be still.

For thus said the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, “In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.” Isaiah 30:15

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. Lamentations 3: 25&26

God knows my heart. Even if he weren't omniscient, I think I've told him my fears and desires, my doubts and questions hundreds of times. And there are moments when I want to demand answers. I want him to show up NOW in my life and take away the confusion.

But this is the verse God has put in my heart these past few days:

"But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me." Psalm 131:2

Like a weaned child. Not seeking anything. Not demanding to be fed. Not waiting for its physical needs to be met. Just resting in the safety and security of the arms of the one who loves you. So, I am trying to calm and quiet my soul. To rest in him. To trust that he loves me, he has a plan for me, and he won't let me miss it. When it's time, he'll answer. Until then, I need to trust him, rest in his presence, feel secure in his love.

The smallest gifts

Today we celebrate women's day in Colombia. One of our new students walked in this morning, her smile beaming above a handful of minature roses. She carefully handed a single tiny rose to every woman who works at Luz y Vida. "Feliz Día"(Happy women´s day!) she said to me as she gave me a hug. I lifted the little rose to my nose and breathed in. The scent from that tiny rose was amazing, transporting me to a summer full of sunshine. In a week that's been challenging for me, her offering of love brought me joy.

As I looked at the rose on my desk, not much bigger than a quarter, I was reminded of something God spoke to my heart earlier this week. Our gifts of love to him may seem small and insignificant, unworthy of being offered to the creator of the universe, but he is still pleased. He is pleased with each small outpouring of love from a faithful heart. He doesn't compare us with one another and only feel pleased with the best gifts. As our Father, any gift prompted by our love brings him pleasure.

So, remember today- You are loved by the Father. He's not waiting until you are perfect and can offer perfect gifts to be pleased by you. He is pleased today. He delights in you and the gifts you bring to him.

Phillipians 4:18b Your gifts are a soothing aroma, a sacrifice that God accepts and with which he is pleased.

Isaiah 62:4b But you will be named My Delight, and your land will be named Married. The LORD is delighted with you, and your land will be married.